The people with whom you have the most contact and who hang around you will have either a positive or negative effect on your levels of self-esteem and confidence.
We all know people who are positive, happy and joyful to be around. They are pleasure to know.
Have you noticed how they make you feel?
They tend to make you feel the same as them, happy and positive! They can put zest into a boring atmosphere and can fill the room with positive, ‘can do’ vibes, and that has a knock on effect onto everyone else
.On the other hand, we also know of those people who are the opposite and who can moan for England, and continually do so!
According to them they never had the opportunities, they are always putting people down, they don’t like other people to be successful, they are jealous and are negative thinkers – and so much more!
These people have the ability to drain the energy from the room, and they bring everyone down to their level, they make everyone feel miserable. This is a million miles away from the level that YOU want to be operating on.
Have you noticed how they make you feel?It is often the case that some family members can be a lot like this. However, whilst you can usually choose your friends, you have little or no choice with your family!
So what can you do to make sure that the people who you have most contact with empower and support what you stand for rather than bring you down all of the time?
You have the power to choose who you have contact with. Ideally you want happy, vibrant and positive people. If there are people who are constantly draining your positive energy you have a couple of options. One option is to tell the draining people exactly how you feel and if they are really good friends they will respect your wishes and may change their behaviour. If they drift into the negative again, try to ignore it. Interestingly if they aren’t really good friends, they will drift away and go to find someone else to drain. Another option is to distance yourself from the negative people, they may or may not notice. If they do and want to know why, explain to them how you feel. If they don’t, all to the good they are directing their negativity at someone else.
The same can be said for your family. Your more mature relatives have been conditioned for many, many years and are a different generation. Appreciate where they have come from whilst being selective with the information that filters through to your brain. You have the same choices as with your friends for the younger relatives, tell them how you feel and they will either change something or drift away.
Don’t attach any guilt to your decisions, as it is your life and if you are tired of the negativity, it is time for you to do something about it.
You may well find that you will make new friends who are positive and upbeat and some members of your family may reappear who have also removed themselves from negative relatives.
If this resonates with you, and you would like to learn more about my work and how I can help you, get in touch with me today. I would like to hear from you.
Transformational Coach, ConsultantFounder of MAGGIE CURRIE COACHING